Rare evening practice

I just finished my today's Ashtanga practice. On the weekend I didn't manage to get on my mat (shame on me) and therefore I really missed an extensive practice with enough time. So I decided to move my today's practice to the evening. In the morning I only practiced some pranayama and a few soft poses. The whole day I have been looking forward to the practice and barely returned from work I changed clothes and jumped on my mat. My boyfriend hasn't yet returned from work, so I had no distractions.
The practice was on the one hand very good. I was quite focused, managed to concentrate on the breath and really felt a connection between the breath and the heat/energy level. On the other side I found it so hard and exhausting. At first I planned to practice full primary but when I reached Navasana I was already so worn out that I said to myself 'ok, that's it, enough for today'. Then I did Urdhva Danurasana and Finishing. Despite practicing only until Navasana I spent nearly two hours on the mat. I took it very slow and added some extra-poses.
And I couldn't avoid to have a feeling of slight frustration during the practice. I don't know exactly why, probably because I sometimes have a feeling of never moving on and always remaining at the same level. Of course my sense says that this is not true, but sometimes it feels so. It's hard to notice any progress if you're always on your own. Also I'm not so good at motivating myself if I'm always on my own. Ok, enough whining, the next workshop will surely come and give me some extra-motivation.
Right now I'm thinking about visiting a Yoga Retreat at the North Sea in summer. It is guided by my two favourite teachers, so this would sure be great. Let's see ...

More attention

Today's practice was good, Sirsasana was the highlight. I managed to bring the legs parallel to the floor and up again several times, I didn't count. Also I have the feeling of getting a little bit faster every time I practice. This is good, because I will be able to do more poses in the same time. But of course only if it's not at the expense of deep breathing and attention to the body. I must not forget my hamstrings, they aren't completly healed yet, but I already act as if they were. I have to pay more attention to them.
Right now I'm quite exhausted, the working day was stressful. I'm going to lie on my sofa and watch my favourite series: Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy ;-)

Easter family practice

Easter weekend is almost over, tomorrow we're all going back to work - business as usual. In the early afternoon we returned from a two day family visit. It was nice, I visited my parents, my two grandmothers and one of my several aunts with her family, and of course my boyfriend's family. So it really was a family weekend and I enjoyed it very much. There have been times when I found it a little bit stressful to visit relatives I don't see that often but this time was really nice.
My boyfriend's older sister and her husband recently started practicing Yoga and they always ask me to practice together. They don't visit classes but they practice according to a Hatha Yoga CD. Once I gave some kind of lesson for them, but this time I didn't feel like doing that again because I knew that my own practice would suffer - I am selfish I know. So I tried something different. We did sun salutations together then I went on with my usual Ashtanga practice and they went on practicing with their CD. Also some kind of Mysore style practice, everyone practiced according to its needs. And I was very surprised that it worked really really well. They practiced with the CD a sequence of fundamental asanas simply one after another without Vinyasas or things like that and I practiced the series until Baddha Konasana. Sometimes I said something corrective if something really caught my eyes but otherwise everyone did his/her practice. For me the practice was great, focus, breath, sweat everything was there and also the unique spirit of people practicing Yoga together.
And now I'm up for a small evening practice, hopefully a good finish of this weekend.

Morning stiffness

Weather is quite unsettled here. Yesterday morning when I was practicing the sun shone through the window on my face, today it snowed. Also as I went home from work, it snowed. Mostly I go by bike. It's a wonderful route, almost completly through forest. I live at the city limit and my job is in the next village. It takes about 20 minutes to get there by bike. Today the air was ice-cold and snowflakes on my face, but it was refreshing. It's a good way to start the leisure-time because you get your head free of job thoughts.
Practice today was ok. The concentration really is missing quite a bit, too many thoughts about unimportant stuff, I have to work on that. It felt as if I was not really willing to do the practice and the mind is searching for whatever to escape from practice.
And one pose is absolutely terrible in the morning: it's Paschimottanasana, there all the morning stiffness strikes me hardest. When I practice at any other time it's possible that my belly touches the thighs but in the morning absolutely no chance! I wonder if this will ever change. But I read that this stiffness has a protective function, that it prevents us from injure ourselves, this function gets lost in the evening. I will believe it and try not to become desperate in Paschimottanasana.

Home practice

Last weekend was Arjuna's workshop here in my city, I haven't been there. I'd love to go there but it was wiser not to go, definitly healthier. Anyway he was my first teacher and it would have been a great chance to meet him and all the other yogis. I'm a little bit sad now that I missed the chance but I also know that my body was not yet ready.
As I don't have an Ashtanga teacher in my range the occasions for practicing Mysore style with a good teacher a very, very rare for me. It's limited to one or two weekend workshops per year. So I almost always practice alone at home. This has its advantages but I also miss the guidance and the advice of a good teacher. And I think that I would go further beyond my limits as I do at home and therefore the progress would perhaps be a little bit faster. At home there are days where the practice is inattentive and sloppy, never would this be if Arjuna's watching me. In return home practice teaches you a lot of things: to motivate yourself, to overcome the obstacles we put in our way ourselves ... I don't know what is better, probably a good mixture of both, home practice and classes.
Anyway if this tendinitis is completly over I definitly have to visit more workshops!

Moving meditations

Absolutely great practice today! I practiced until Navasana whereas I omitted some postures (Ardha Baddha Padmottanasana, Ardha Baddha Padma Paschimottanasana, Janu Sirsasana C), then Urdhva Danurasana, which was surprisingly good for haven't practiced it for a long time and finishing positions. Body felt light and soft today, I really sweated buckets and in Shavasana the whole body was vibrating from energy. Great!
No Yoga yesterday, but one hour jogging in the forest with nice sunshine and excessive dancing in the night. For me dancing is also a form of moving meditation, sometimes you reach a point where you totally forget yourself, there is just music and movement. And in contrast to Yoga it's also a strong way to express yourself because generally you are not alone when you dance and so this is a way to communicate with other people. Anyway I love dancing and especially reaching this point I have spoken about. As this doesn't happen that often I was really happy about last night.

Not much time ...

... today, therefore very short practice: only Surya Namaskaras and three streching positions.
But it was great anyway, because my body was never softer this week, hamstrings felt really good. A pity that I didn't have the time to make more of it.
In spite the good practice I don't feel so good today: ladies' days. I just want to lay down somewhere with a cuddly blanket and a huge cup of tea ... guess I will do exactly that after writing.

Yesterday I watched the movie 'Step up 2 the streets' at cinema, I love the dancing scenes, the rest of the movie is quite silly, but the dancing is really great. By the way I will register for a ballet class that is starting in April, I want to get to know the mother of all dances :-) Perhaps I also will learn some new tricks about flexibility, generally dancers are super-flexible. I'm very curious!

Sirsasana

So how was today's practice? Body felt softer, breath was worse than yesterday, focus was ok, Shavasana was great, the highlight of the practice no doubt.
Right now I'm working a little bit on Sirsasana, me and this asana is truly a never-ending story. First you have to know that I count myself to one of the most unathletic persons I know. It always takes ages til I learn something that implies non-trivial physical coordination. It took me ages to learn swimming, it took me ages to learn riding a bike and so on. So you can imagine how fast I learned the headstand and for me it's still a wonder that I'm able to do this.
But the finishing sequence not only contains headstand but a few additional variations, this is the sequence I learned:
10 breaths in normal headstand, 10 breaths with head lifted up, 10 breaths with legs parallel to the floor and then 10 times moving the legs from vertical down til almost touching the floor and up again.
My current practice-status is:
10 breaths in normal headstand, omitting the head-lifted-up-thing, that is not (yet) possible, 5 (fast) breaths with legs parallel to the ground and then moving legs up-down at most 3 times.
So there is still much work to do, isn't it? Also I'm not yet able to come up in headstand with straight legs, or let's say I'm not able to do it without wall, because indeed I'm able to come up but at the highest point I don't manage to bring the hip back to the middle fast enough and then I would topple to the other side if there wasn't my wall. Lacking physical coordination! But I'm sure I will learn this sooner or later. I'm already used to the fact that everything comes to me a little later.

Got up earlier

I moved my get-up-time to 6:20 a.m. instead of 6:30 a.m., which makes not that big difference. So I can spend about an hour on my mat and still can manage to be at work before 9:00 a.m. This is absolutely ok for now. I wonder if I ever manage to get up early enough to practice full primary. But I take this step by step. For now I practice fundamental and for that purpose this schedule works fine.
Practice was good, breath was very constant, deep and easy. My hamstrings don't feel that good just the same with my back. I'm so, so, so stiff right after getting up. I wonder if this ever changes, but I have to work with this situation. Lookin' forward to tomorrow's practice.

Greeting the sun

This morning I stood up, prepared for practice, stepped on my mat and just as I was rising my arms for the first surya namaskara, the red morning sun crept over the neighbouring rooftop and sent her first rays directly through the window in my room. So this was literally saluting the sun! The situation was some kind of magic and put a smile on my face.
Then I went on with the practice, as yesterday I practiced til Purvottanasana. I still felt yesterday's practice in my limbs additional to the usual morning stiffness, but it was ok. I sweated a lot and for me this is mostly a sign of a good practice. The flow is still missing a little bit but this is also due to my super-carefulness.
Actually I felt the effect of practice til noon, some kind of light, numb feeling ... Maybe the reason is that I radically shortened the finishing sequence and only did Sirsasana, the lotus poses and Shavasana? I don't know, but I think I have to get up a little bit earlier, 6:20 a.m. instead of 6:30 a.m. I'm trying that tomorrow.

Comeback of Standing Sequence

We went out last night, it was nice, meeting some friends, a little bit dancing ... So I slept quite long today and it was already afternoon when I finally found the way to my mat. I felt a bit weak and low before, so I expected not much, but practice was quite good.
I practiced the fundamental sequence, I don't know if this is a common term, it includes Surya Namaskaras, standing positions without balancing positions and goes til Purvottanasana. Today I practiced the standing positions for the first time since a quite long injury-break. In fact Utthita Trikonasana and Prasarita Padottanasana were the most critical asanas according to the injury. I was super-careful, super-attentive and super-slow and it worked! I was able to practice this fundamental sequence completly without pain and this is a great achievement for me. But I really noticed that I haven't practiced the poses for a long time, it was quite hard from time to time. But one thing I really learned from the injuries is to keep the attention, this works quite well. I will try now to include this fundamental sequence in my daily practice. There is still much work to do on these poses.

Weekend

No practice today, at least no serious practice. It's a little bit strange but for me it's more difficult to practice on weekend than on the other weekdays though I have much more time on weekends. The reason is an ordinary weekday has its fixed schedule where the Yoga practice has its fixed time slot. I don't have to do much thinking or planning, I just run through my schedule.
On weekends this schedule does not exist, everything is open and there are always several other things that want to be done on weekends. So I have to schedule my Yoga practice somehow.
But I also think that skipping one day is not that bad, I guess in Mysore the saturdays are also practice-free. Hope to do some practice tomorrow.
Next weekend there is an Ashtanga workshop in our town, it is lead by my first teacher. I'm not yet sure if I should go there. The practice is still too much for me. And since I often tend to go over the top at such occasions it would be wiser to practice at home. But let's see, there is still one week left to think about it.

New moon, Yin time

Today is new moon and I practiced Yin Yoga. I'm still not sure what to think about all this moon-energy-subject. Traditional Ashtangis say you should not practice on moon days because our energy level is out of balance which increases the risk of injuries. Other people say that these are only old-fashioned traditions which do not really make sense. I don't know.
But since I want to practice Yin Yoga once per week anyway, why not do it on the moon day? I think Yin Yoga is the perfect complement to the powerful, dynamic Ashtanga and I hope it will increase my flexibility by the time.
Anyway it was a good practice, time went by so fast, it is really astonishing how much time 10 breaths can take if you are deep into the pose.

Where do I stand ...

... on my Ashtanga path?
Hm, not easy to answer.
I started practising Yoga in summer 2003, but not Ashtanga, it was some kind of Vinyasa Flow Yoga. It was great, because we had a great teacher, I'm sure I will find some words about him in future. One year later I started with Ashtanga, with the same teacher. In the beginning I only practised once per week and only at the class, not at home. This changed in the following two years, Yoga and especially Ashtanga became more and more important to me, it consumed more and more time. I also made some progress, I used to practise full primary series.
The break came in october, 2006. At that time I was so involved in our city-Yoga-scene that I often acted in place for other Yoga teachers and even lead own classes at our university sports center. And this was definitly too much in a too short period of time. My body unmistakably told me that by getting injured. I was caught in the trap that waits for many Ashtanga beginners I guess: too much ambition, too much focus on forms etc. In fact I have been struggling with injuries for the last 1,5 years, which threw me back many, many steps. My main problem are the hamstrings, especially of the left leg, this is my weakest point. Right now there are still the effects of a tendinitis at the tuber ischiadicum (this is my own diagnosis!), but I think I'm on a path of healing now. I definitly learned some important lessons through all this injury stuff, also about anatomy :-).
Due to the injuries I haven't practised Ashtanga for the second half of the last year, instead I returned to Vinyasa Flow variants, because I needed the flexibility to chose the poses that were suitable and to avoid those that were not.
This year I started again with Ashtanga, on a daily basis, but I take it slow, slow, slow. In fact I only practise Surya Namaskaras plus my special hamstring-therapy-program which I developed for my needs. But it's absolutely ok, I'm glad I can do this. And I have good hope that I can add the standing sequence soon.
So my path had reached a little peak about 1,5 years ago and then fell almost back to the ground, but only from a physical point of view. In other areas the path continued climbing the hill, I've gained much insights into my attitude towards practice. And with this new wisdom I'm trying now to build up also the physical path again. :-)

Let's begin ...

Hu, this is my very first blog, I'm quite curious how this will develop.
I got the idea to have my own blog about an hour ago when I was driving home from work. I was thinking about how much I enjoyed reading Ashtanga/Yoga/Mysore blogs in the last weeks (on many days I enjoyed it definitly more than working ;-) ). So why not doing the same? Why not bringing other people joy with my Ashtanga blog? So, here it is, I hope it will work!